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My story

On behalf of a Wonderful Lady who we are supporting who wants to share her story ...

My story is a long one so please bear with me & I will try not to miss anything.

In Jan 2017 my little legs came to live with me.. a family member had removed them from BM & ss got involved. After some time it was agreed they could remain here under a private fostering agreement (no financal help), with a view to go back to BM. Ss decided that little legs was not going home & for me to consider CAO or SGO. Gave me 3 months to decide & wait till next CP meeting in Feb 2018.

BM became pregnant in Nov 2017, & informed SS of termination in Jan 2018. I decided that yes I would go for a CAO.

In March 2018 it came out the pregnancy was hidden & was now 20 weeks. BM has stated to ss from this time if she couldn’t keep the baby her wishes that it came to me to be with sibling (I am not related to this family, just a friend). Baby was born July 2018 withdrawn. SS lied to both of us & took it straight to court to put the baby into FC. Court happened early Sept 2018 & judge ordered a. Connected person assessment on me.

After trying to move things with SS for older child I decided with BM consent to apply myself to the court for CAO. Assessment happened & came out negative. I challenged this in Jan 2019, & paid for an ISW who carried out another assessment which was positive.

In March 2019 I was granted the CAO for older child. In June 2019 SS called to say oh we want baby to come to u now ( adoption was the only option till then) transition plan agreed court date all agreed for placement end of July. In court we all agreed that an SGO would be better for older child, judge said to SS bring back your support plan & financial package and it can happen next court (sept 2019).

Placement was stopped by CSW with no explanation. I was devastated,I had done everything they had asked, I was treated and spoke to like I was a piece of ....!!! I’d had enuff. I introduced a solicitor in June 2019, done all of it up until then on my own.

Another meeting was arranged 2 weeks after placement date, & I took my solicitor with me. Another transition plan was arranged with a plan of placement end of Sept 2019. I am self employed & took the 6 weeks holiday out of work with no income, I have had to use my savings to pay my bills. I have said I can only have a couple of weeks off once placed..... SS don’t know how long they want me to have off they talked of 9 months (if you adopted you would need 9 months out apparently) SS talked maybe just 3 months off. Beginning of September I informed SS I can only take 2 more weeks out... I work from home!!!!!

They haven’t confirmed if this is acceptable so I’m guessing there is an issue, the solicitor has also asked for clarification no response. Not heard from guardian. I will have done 41 transition dates in total... adoption is 10!!!!!!!

So I am at the point now where I give up.... SS have pulled everything out of me & my fight is gone. They say fight or flight. I’ve been fighting long enuff. Sibling is sorted on CAO hopefully going to SGO. I’m just telling my story seeing if any1 else has been through this outrageous system similar to me and has an outcome, I’ve no idea what’s going to happen. I am deflated and not bothered either way any more due to SS. I don’t even know if I have to pay the solicitors costs at this stage. Thanks for reading my story xx


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